Hello again, is there anyone out there?

I am back. Yes, I am afraid this is Polly Lushbottom: Round Two.

It’s been a long time since I posted, I know. Much and a little has happened since. I moved half way down the Island with the family and got a new job and a new (to us) house with stairs which seemed like a good idea at the time.  I am fifty, people, fifty.  And fat. With arthritis in my knees. Do you think the two studies, and two large basement rooms affected my decision at all? My lips are sealed – unless liquorice allsorts are in the vicinity.

Anyways back to crafting. I am into Art journaling currently using very mixed media, which I make, beg, borrow or buy budget so it’s as cheap as possible. I take this approach cos I need to financially and more importantly because I work alongside people on very low incomes.  In my wisdom I decided it would be a jolly fine idea to introduce Recovery Journaling at work so people could use their creativity to support their wellbeing. The immediate issue was that art costs. Most people I work with struggle to keep a roof over their heads and to buy enough food.

So I Pinterested and surfed and so on until I felt ready to start, which of course all happened in a time warp just before we were due to start. Planning is anathema to the artistic temperament darlings, don’t you know.

Anyways I thought I would post some pics of what I have been doing – the good, the bad and the Damn that’s ugly…. You never know it may cheer some of you up when you see what seething monsters I spawn

So, drum roll… let the pages begin…

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Well, long time no hear. I know Miss Polly has been remiss in blogging but I feel the world needs a bit of Polly at the moment.

My beloved’s colleague is leaving work to go back to the UK.  Of course Miss Polly immediately saw the possibilities of a UK-themed morning tea. So I did what I had to do, and created a monster tea cosy! Yup, it is almost as misshapen as my first one but I don’t care. I had no pattern (bet you didn’t guess) so joins the ranks of my many other misshapen craft projects.

I also whipped up a large fake pearl necklace suitable for someone about to drink from a teapot bedecked in a lopsided Union Jack tea cosy.

I may even sew a large red cross on to my new white tablecloth…

And I’m not even going to be there.

Proof positive that it’s time Miss Polly was let out to play.

Image

But don’t fret dears, I have crafted much since I last wrote and will post evidence of despair and delights more regularly from now on.

Hmmm, found myself musing then on Craft Constipation. or Blogger’s Block. I rely on you, my dear friends who are far wittier than I, to come up with a jolly good phrase. 

Anyways good luck to social worker Sue, may your future be bright, your ears warm, and all your tea, cosy!

As you can see I have completely forgotten how to format, but as I like to say, “Gaily forward dears…”

Better blogging!


Or Fifi la Toiletbelle

Hello dears,

You may know that my dear friend asked me recently whether I knew how to make a poodle toilet roll cover. Mercy, I thought.  Can such a thing exist?

I am delighted to announce dears, that yes, it can. I have scoured the back alley ways of the internet and chanced across this perky specimen of a pink poodle. Just for you, Miss Muppet.

Long have I pondered over this. What dark night of the soul drove a person to even contemplate making a toilet roll cover that looked like a poodle?  Or should one merely be grateful that one’s life journey, while turbulent, never led them to pink pompoms?

I think not. In all seriousness being house proud is a marvellous thing.  As in, I may not have much money but I am an able hooker. I will hook a cover so that when people are fortunate enough to visit my little room they will be charmed by the decor and the, err, poodle. After all it would simply not do for them to actually see a TOILET ROLL. It might scare them off from going in!

Clearly the creator did not have a misspent flatting career , unlike Miss Polly. Quite honestly dears, after years of flatting the thought of NOT finding a toilet roll in one’s little room is terrifying.

My thanks to http://www.craftster.org/forum/index.php?topic=318121.0 for this image. Bless her granma I say.

Hello dears,

what an interesting start to blogging. I have the rather unfab Teacosy on Steroids to show you. Warning: I accept no responsibility for trauma caused by seeing it.

Note the fact it is twice as tall as it needs to be and too wide. This is what happens when I (Polly) am sick and can’t be bothered actually getting off the couch to get the teapot to measure the teapot to make the teacosy the right size.  Why do I have to learn lessons the hard way?

Alas, I am going to upcycle it to a laptop cover. Yes that’s how wrong it is. Plus I love the idea of startling the suits in the Koru Lounge when I fly for work. He he he.

Apologies to Meme Rose for moidering her lovely design.

The rather lovely edging at bottom is from Crochet with Raymond here.

Don’t let this put you off, gentle readers.  It’s a foolproof pattern. Just not Pollyproof. Especially Polly on Prednisdone.

Celebrating the uncivil union of Prednisdone and Miss Polly

Actually, Pansy Potter from Beano

Welcome to the willing, if not able, world of Polly Lushbottom and my dodgy crafts. You have been warned.

I love lots of crafts including crochet, beading, scrapbooking, free motion machine embroidery and quilting. I am in fact an inveterate dabbler. I also collect shiny words and gay geegaws.

I aim to provide a safe place for people like me to laugh and share our fantastical creations. Frankly dears, one is often a little put off by other’s crafting powress. Thus I bring my alter ego,  Polly Lushbottom out to play in this blog. I like to think of her as the Homer Simpson of the craft world.

Interestingly I have just done a google search on Miss Polly and found a burlesque dancer called Lolly Lushbottom!   We may be related in spirit?